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On September 22, a year-old woman—a new mom with a young child—calls her doctor for results of a biopsy.
Nine months earlier she had surgery and very early, noninvasive breast cancer was found. She places the call from work, believing that all will be fine. Thoughtlessly, her doctor reads her pathology results: The devastating diagnosis is delivered with no explanation, no reassurance, no handholding.
She hangs up and begins measuring her remaining lifespan in seconds. How short will cancer cut her life?
Will her son lose his mother while he is young, as she lost hers at age 12? What will her treatment be like? She is scared, overwhelmed, and angry. This is my letter to that young woman: I want to console you and provide the reassurance and guidance that you need.
These words are my heartfelt expression of love and a prophecy, if you will, of a brighter future. I watch you tuck your son in bed at night and bravely smile as he looks up at you with trusting eyes. You will do everything you can to spare him from your pain and preserve his wonder, innocence, and well-being just a little longer.
I ache for you as you pull out photos from a year ago; a new mother caressing the baby in your arms, before this cruel disease entered your life. It feels unbearable that you will never experience childbirth again.
But you will eventually make peace with this profound loss. You will continue to parent your child, providing a steady hand, a strong moral compass, and all the love you have to give. You will face challenges, loneliness, stigma, gut-wrenching grief, life-changing surgeries.
You will lose your breasts, your ovaries, your fertility, your hair, some friends, your confidence, and sometimes, your lunch. But one day you will regain your self worth. You will no longer feel like damaged goods. You will offer yourself wholly in love and friendship again and people will value what you have to offer.
You will enjoy desire and intimacy again, and will appreciate the quiet whispered words of love, and the ecstatic shouts of unbridled passion. You are suspended in the moment, an avalanche of decisions, research, statistics, and treatments threatening to bury you.
You are paralyzed with the gravity of every choice and terrified of making the wrong decision. But know that you will fight with every ounce of your being, question your doctors, and exhaustively research all options.
Try to trust yourself to choose. You have always been wise. Make the best decision you can and then embrace it with all your might. I know right now the weight of your diagnosis and uncertainty grip you like a vise; even the simple act of breathing seems monumental.
You hold your breath, as you wait for the next crisis or piece of bad news. But I promise you that one day you will breathe hope like oxygen; it will expand your lungs and buoy you with optimism. You are feeling joyless but you will know true happiness.
You are feeling lost but you will find your way; and when you do, your light will shine so brightly that others will follow in your path and gain comfort and guidance from you.
Cancer will change you. It will shape you and set your course in directions you never have imagined. But in the end, it will not crush, consume, or destroy you.
I feel your pain. I feel for you.Dec 08, · A Love Letter to My Friend With Cancer As soon as the diagnosis came, your entire world shifted on its axis, and in turn, so did the worlds of those who love you.
12/08/ am . Jul 01, · Writing about someone else's could feel offensive. Just be the supportive friend you are and listen.
If you have any questions about how to deal with cancer – as a patient, carer, relative or friend – I strongly recommend that you check out the UK charity, Macmillan. It offers extensive, well-written information on all aspects of living with cancer. Your friend with cancer needs you and your support. For cancer information, day-to-day help, and emotional support, visit regardbouddhiste.com or call We’re there when you need us – 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Dec 22, · A Letter to My Friend with Breast Cancer Dear Dian, Sue shared with me the good news about your surgery and the pathology report – clear margins and no cancer in the lymph regardbouddhiste.com: Stacy Sells.
The focus should be on the experiences of the person to whom you are writing the card. Never mention medical advice in a get well card, even if you are a cancer specialist.
A get well card is not the place to write treatment regardbouddhiste.coms: 9. If you have any questions about how to deal with cancer – as a patient, carer, relative or friend – I strongly recommend that you check out the UK charity, Macmillan.
It offers extensive, well-written information on all aspects of living with cancer. It's good that you think to write to your friend! Like most of us, I have had friends and family suffer from cancer. Cancer patients sometimes say that their friends don't know what to say to them, and so say nothing, which makes the .
I share my fantasy letter to inspire hope in newly diagnosed women and those currently battling cancer. If you have been diagnosed with breast cancer, please consider taking a few minutes to help us out by completing this short survey.
To help you craft the perfect message for the cancer patient in your life, we spoke to Alison and Brian of From Me to You; a letter-writing charity doing fantastic work for cancer patients and their families.
As the champions of letter-writing in the cancer community, they know firsthand just how valuable a thoughtful note can be.